Just Me!

I am a wife, mother & keen photographer with an obsession for Scrap booking. My motto is live life to the max and don't regret too much! Thankyou for taking the time to visit my blog!

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    Visit my mini league "Scrappad"
    Tuesday, August 30, 2005
    Well again i am feeling depressed!

    Today was Corey's appt with his consultant to check his weight. I was optimistic when we went as i thought he had been eating ok. The milk that he hadn't been taking orally he had made up for in yoghurts and other stuff but i guess not. He has lost 6oz in the last 4 wks. I was sure he wouldn't have lost any :(
    Anyway, the Doctor rang the dietician to get some advice but she was away on holiday so he left the details and she's gonna ring me. Either things will stay as they are for the next 4 wks or he may get calorie supplements. We are to back to see him every 4 wks for the future.
    I am so sad, i feel like a failure. I so desperately don't want him to have the tube back in. I've cried all afternoon. I know i'm over reacting a bit but i'm just so disappointed about it all. It's been so stressful recently and i guess i'm after just a teeny bit of a break.
    posted by Cath @ 8:00 PM   4 comments
    Monday, August 29, 2005
    So my little man has been doing some new things over the last few days.

    Dancing to the Tweenies(well stomping his feet lol!)

    He can now reach the door handles and we keep finding him upstairs :o

    He can now climb the stairs at lightning speed!

    He has started walking backwards

    He can now get on his toy car by himself

    Drinking his milk properly, i.e, not just pouring it into his mouth!

    He's also taken a liking to eating paper so we've had to move absolutely everything!
    posted by Cath @ 4:57 PM   4 comments
    For anyone interested in Scrapbooking i have set up a new blog.

    I did set one up before but this is different.

    Basically it's a record of all my favourite Scrap related sites and each day i'll upload new ones for you to check out.

    Feel free to check it out!! Scrapping this and that!
    posted by Cath @ 4:06 PM   1 comments
    So yesterday finished off ok. I went out to do some retail shopping and spent a fortune on clothes. When i came home Dave and i were ok and i made dinner while Dave had a nap. Corey did well with his food. I made him a plate of Quorn in mushroom sauce, turnip, carrots, sweet potato and gravy and he ate a fair amount. He followed this with a large orange yoghurt and then 4oz of strawberry milk.
    Tomorrow is D-Day as we go to see the consultant to see how he is doing and what his weight is like. Can you believe he's been without his tube for 4 wks!!! I'm completely stunned!
    posted by Cath @ 4:02 PM   2 comments
    Sunday, August 28, 2005
    I am having a really bad day.

    It's just turned 8am and i have woke up in one of my depressive moods that i just cannot get out off. It started when DH informed me that he had taken Corey to see the animals at Graves Park yesterday. I wanted to be there when he saw the animals as i like to take pictures too for my scrapbooking. It wasn't an organised trip but they were there anyway playing golf but the frame of mind i'm in means that doesn't make any difference to me. I'll have a go at him about anything right now. Then whilst getting the milk out of the fridge to make a coffee(that was DH's fault too cause he should have made me one!) i knocked the eggs and four of them smashed on the floor. When DH came in the kitchen and tried to help i just shouted at hom to get out! His simple reply to me was 'Your back then. That has really hit a nerve and i am now sat here feeling more depressed than i have done in weeks. This last month i have worked really hard getting my life back on track so i didn't need the antidepressants and now i feel like it was all for nothing. DH and i had been getting on so well and i feel so low again today that i feel like sobbing. I know i need to pull myself together, get dressed, apologise to hubby and just get on with it but the mood i'm in i just don't know if i can do it!
    posted by Cath @ 8:11 AM   3 comments
    Saturday, August 27, 2005
    I am not and never have been a cricket fan.
    But at the moment England are playing Australia and i find myself compelled to watch because England are playing magnificently! They have just bowled Australia all out for just 218 which is fabulous and within the space of about an hour they bowled 5 out! They have made Australia bat first and i just hope they can keep up this pace. It would be fabulous if they could win the Ashes!!
    posted by Cath @ 12:21 PM   0 comments
    Self Portrait Saturday?
    So yesterday was Self Portrait Friday and i forgot to post a pic of me so i am doing it today. This is a picture of me looking very curly/frizzy haired, what my hair tend to do if i don't straighten it. So i am posting this picture even though i absolutely hate it!
    posted by Cath @ 10:25 AM   5 comments

    Ok, this isn't wrong is it???................MY BREAKFAST!!!
    posted by Cath @ 10:19 AM   0 comments
    Well i did manage to sleep fitfully last night actually. Fell asleep straight away about 11pm. DH got up with Corey at 7 and i got to lie in bed although it took me an hr to get back to sleep as i had things on my mind and the bird running rhythmically across the dorma roof didn't help much either.
    I've woken up to a very quiet & empty house as the boys have all gone to Graves park. Coffee and scrapbooking me thinks!!
    posted by Cath @ 10:07 AM   0 comments
    Friday, August 26, 2005
    Today has been a fairly busy day. Today my friend Jill came over for a coffee with her two kids. Weird to think that her daughter Hollie who is the same height as Corey and weighs twice as much is 4 months younger than he is. he did good today though. We have problems with sensory issues and the sound of a child crying or screaming and he immediately bursts into tears. Well Hollie hurt herself and screamed for a good 15 mins. What did Corey do? He smiled and carried on playing the whole time. A step forward me thinks :D Although it was at poor Hollies expense :(
    Anyway after Jill had gone it was Coreys naptime then lunch and then i had a visit to the dentist. I have had a sore tongue for over 6 wks now and the cause i think is a sharp tooth. However, my tongue has taken a funny appearance recently with funny red patches and white lines. It turns out i have something calle Geographic Tongue. It's fairly common and cause no problems apart from some soreness but there is no cure for it and it's not known what cause it. Basically the skin on the tongue grows quicker in some places than others and gives an appearance of a road map lol! I've looked at some pictures on the net and compared to some of them mine is practically not existent! Anyway, he filed my tooth down so we shall she if it works. At the moment i am still in pain!

    Corey has been off his food for the past couple of days. May have something to do with the appearance of two new tussy pegs that i glimpsed this morning. These are 1 either side of the four bottom teeth. It's about time he got some more though as we've had twelve for what seems like a lifetime!
    I'm in the process of doing a CJ right now on true ghost stories and i bet i don't sleep tonight!
    Managed to finish a LO a couple of nights ago but am suffering from a touch of Scrappers block right now :(

    posted by Cath @ 7:31 PM   1 comments
    Thursday, August 25, 2005
    My husband can be very romantic sometimes. Last night he came home with this big bunch of flowers for me. When i asked what they were for he simply said 'Because i love you' Awwwwwww

    My thoughts are with the Wyatt family today. They go to court again to try to turn around the court order to save there daughter. As i type this i have just heard that once again the courts have sided with the hospital and the DNR(do not resusitate) order will stay in place. It makes me very sad.
    For those of you unfamiliar with the Wyatt family here's a small synopsis of there story.

    Charlotte Wyatt was born 14 wks premature in Oct 2003 and only weighed 458 grams. By July 2004 she was doing really well, eating from a spoon and requiring hardly any oxygen. As she was doing well she was moved from the Intensive Care Unit to an ordinary childrens ward where she immediately caught a blood infection and became ill requring her to be ventilated. Three times she was put on a ventilator at times requiring 100% oxygen. The doctors at the hospital in Portsmouth then decided that she would never recover, she would be always blind and deaf, in constant pain, and unable to communicate for the rest of her life. The hospital urged the courts to allow them not to care for her if she would need to be ventilated again. Her parents felt she was a fighter and should be given every chance, and they pleaded for her right to life, but the medical establishment was all on the other side. The Judge decided in favour of the hospital.After the Judge decided that she did not have to receive aggressive care, most Doctors thought that Charlotte would die within few months-- during the winter, from another infection-- but she did not die, and instead prospered. Slowly, slowly she started getting better. She started being able to respond to her parents again, to laugh, to cry, to smile, and now she can see and hear. She also has started to be able to take food by mouth again, when they place small amounts on her lower lip. Her lungs have grown stronger, and now she needs only 45%, instead of the 100% she had needed last autumn.
    In the middle of March, her parents went again to the Judge, and asked him to rescind his order, telling him that their daughter was no longer in constant pain, and was no longer unable to respond. The Judge "was pleased" with Charlotte's improvements, but listened to the hospital, which said that they were not good enough to warrant resuscitation if she got sick again. He did however say that he would hear them again after Easter.
    On 21 April, the Judge again decided against removing the Do Not Resucitate (DNR) order from Charlotte, a decision her parents will appeal to the Appeals Court, and, if necessary, the European Court.
    Many times Charlotte's parents have asked for her medical records, and their attorney has also, but so far to no avail. The hospital, defensive after being shown wrong in so much of what they said, is unwilling to give any information that might show how they have failed.
    But Charlotte is still fighting for life, though her case in the English Judiciary does not look hopeful.

    You can read Charlottes blog here
    posted by Cath @ 6:23 PM   4 comments
    Wednesday, August 24, 2005

    Just had to post this picture. How cool is that??!!!!

    The Space Shuttle Discovery hitched a ride on NASA's modified Boeing 747 Shuttle Carrier Aircraft for the flight from the Dryden Flight Research Center in California, to Kennedy Space Center, Florida, on August 19, 2005. The cross-country ferry flight to return Discovery to Florida after it's landing in California will take two days, with stops at several intermediate points for refueling
    posted by Cath @ 3:16 PM   2 comments
    For all you scrapbookers out there......
    ..... you will totally relate to this.

    This was posted on a forum i am a member of.

    Top Ten Things Men Understand About Women
    Just smile and pass it on.

    Well this lady sent it to her hubby and this was his response!

    Top Ten Things Men Understand About Women

    1.They Scrap Book
    2.They Talk About Scrap booking
    3.They Dream About Scrap booking
    4.They Email About Scrap booking
    5.They Go To Work Wishing They Were Scrap booking
    6.They Watch TV Trying To Find More Scrap Book Stuff.
    7.They Take Classes In Scrap booking
    8.They Go On Vacation So They Will Have Photos To Scrap Book
    9.They Buy Set's With Missing Letters From QVC - Just So They Can Talk about Scrapbooking even more.
    10.They Turn Your Guest Room Into A Scrap Book Super Store From All The Things They Just Have To Have.

    Just smile and Say Cheese.
    posted by Cath @ 1:02 PM   2 comments
    Factual TV
    I love to watch factual TV. At the moment soap operas just have nothing to offer me.

    Over the last 3 wks i have been watching a programme about the lives of 6 children who were born with some level of disability. The series was called 'Born to be different'. Talk about emotional! Basically here is the synopsis -

    Filmed over five years, Born to Be Different is a frank and unsentimental portrait of the joy and heartache of life with a disabled child. Six families have allowed exceptionally intimate access to their lives following the birth of a disabled baby. The series charts everything from the initial shock of diagnosis and day-to-day practicalities, to the tough decisions and long-term reality of living with disability.

    Over time, the parents' hope and fears change as they deal with medical problems, operations and the good and bad news about their child's condition – all this while trying to maintain a normal family life.

    Some families face prejudice, while others fall apart under the strain. But there are flashes of humour and the typical pleasures of childhood too. And as the children grow up, and the differences between them and their friends become more apparent, they start to articulate their own feelings.

    If you want to know more about the children featured in this program, and believe me they are all an inspiration, then you can see them here.

    Another programme i watched a couple of nights ago was about a young boy who suffers with Proteus Syndrome. This is the disease that they think John Merrick had who was referred to as 'The Elephant Man'. Basically the disease makes bones, joints and their connective tissue grown uncontrollably. More on the programme can be found here
    This boy was truly remarkable. Not only could he still walk about even though his limbs were bent the wrong way but you very rarely heard him complain and he had such a zest for life. I found both these programs truly inspirational but totally overwhelmingly emotional.

    posted by Cath @ 11:55 AM   0 comments
    Tuesday, August 23, 2005
    Well today i havent stopped. After getting up and feeding Corey we headed into town to do some window shopping. It was nice to browse round the shops. Got a few toiletries froms Boots and then we headed for Mothercare as i needed to get Corey some new shoes. Not only has he hardly got any proper 'walking' shoes but he's almost into a size 4 now so we bought some sturdy brown leather shoes and i also bought him a pair of Thomas the Tank Engine wellies. They are a tad too big for him but they are just so cute!
    I forgot to mention that last week Corey had his eyes tested. They normally but drops in to see to the back of the eye but they didn't do it this time. She said as he was seeing the pictures fine and there was no squint or anything and we had no concerns she thought everything looked fine. We get seen again in a year :)
    I bought a new mobile phone today. Thought i would treat myself as my old one is looking abit tired. Hubbys pleased anyway cause he can get my old one now as his is practically prehistoric!
    posted by Cath @ 6:04 PM   0 comments
    Monday, August 22, 2005
    I seem to be so busy but still my house looks like a tornado has passed through it. I tidy up one space, turn around, and theres crap everywhere. Where does it all come from! I struggle to get the hoover out because Corey hates it so much but there are bits everywhere and as Corey is in the bath right now with Daddy as soon as i've finished typing this i am going to go vacuum. What an exciting life i lead.
    So we went camping last weekend. I was undecided if i wanted to go but thought it would be nice to spent time with my fella and the little guy so we went to a place called Middlewood Farm Camp site on Friday morning. It wasn't what i expected. Firstly i guess i didn't expect it to be so busy, not sure why considering it was the middle of August but it was packed. I didn't expect it to have so many nice facilities and also to be as clean as it was. There was a lovely toilet/shower block which had lovely decor and was also spotlessly clean. There were places to wash your dishes with hot water and a laundry, you could also hire a private bathroom for £4 a night. It was a short walk from Robin Hoods Bay and a short drive to Whitby and Scarborough. The only downside i found was the noise. Obviosuly in a tent you can hear everything. We had a group of 3 couples next to us who talked/laughed/sang etc... into the early hours. I cursed them under my breath but soon realised i think i must be getting old. In the tent at the other side of us was a man who snore, and snore very loudly! Hence to say i didn't get a huge amount of sleep but we had a lovely weekend which more than made up for my lack of shut eye. We had 2 great days of weather and it was a shame to have to come home yesterday! Heres a few pics from the hols!

    So, onto the subject of Corey. Firstly, i think we have cured the constipation. He managed to 'go' yesterday and this afternoon and all is fine again!
    Then feeding is going well too. He's been getting better all the time. A long way off eating 'normally' but great for Corey. We struggled to get him to drink his milk but over the last few days he has drank Banana flavoured milk well so we'll stick with that if thats what he likes. His appetite has increased and he will eat savoury food better. He likes Beans, Sausage and Mashed potato and loves his yoghurts. He's started having some brown toast in a morning for his breakfast with his yoghurt but it still takes him ages to chew it!
    Tonight he has decided he wants to be a bodybuilder i think. He's been stood in the bath with his arms by his side, every so often he grits his teeth and growls whilst tensing his arms into arches and then laughing himself silly. He's totally so funny!!
    posted by Cath @ 6:35 PM   3 comments
    Saturday, August 13, 2005

    This is Justin aka Mr Tumble. Corey's favourite program Boogie Beebies is not on at the moment but it's been replaced with a program called Something Special. They sing songs and Justin does sign language as he goes along. It's amazing how much you pick up, i know loads of signs for different things. It's very imformative for adults and kids and Corey really enjoys it!

    Today i have been to watch my football team Sheffield Wednesday play. They were really terrible and they lost against Southampton 1-0. I took my dad as i had bought him a ticket as part of his birthday present. I love going to watch. It's such a great atmosphere when the 30,000 strong crowd start singing!! Puts abit of a dampner on things when you lose though :(
    posted by Cath @ 7:15 PM   0 comments
    Friday, August 12, 2005
    Your Musical Tastes Match: Jennifer Garner

    posted by Cath @ 9:38 AM   0 comments
    ....... i really dislike being a parent! I was going to say hate but think that's too strong a word! My main gripe obviously at the moment is feeding. Eating is just something that is taken totally for granted but for parents of children whos child has feeding problems it can be a living nightmare. Through the Preemie Forum i am a member of i know quite a few parents who have children who do not eat at all or eat very little. They range from eating small amounts or being fed Nasogastrically or via a g-tube. Ask any of these people and they will tell you the same things. They don't want to be millionaires, they don't want to live in big swanky houses and not have to go to work, they simply want there child to eat! If i had the choice in front of me between several million pounds or the chance for my son to feed normally i sure can tell you the money would still be there!
    Anyway, the other thing i get down about, and this may be a pretty small thing in the concept of everything else but i am fed up of my house ALWAYS being untidy! Just as i clean one room another one looks like a tornado has just been through it. It's not necessarily that Corey or my hubby or even me have made it that way it's just that looking after a little one i never seem to have time to do these things! You may be saying if i have time to write my blog why don't i have time to clean. Well when i clean i like to do it properly and filling in my blog sure takes less time than cleaning. For those people who have more than one child like my friends Steph, Shelley and Debby, i am in totally admiration for you guys cause i'm sure you must feel the same but it is far harder for you, especially as they contend with other stuff in life!
    So this morning i woke with a headache for the second day running, i think it's due to stress. I have an appt at the doctors next week and am sure at that point i will be on anti depressants although i have felt better in the last few days. It helps when hubby and i aren't argueing! My IBS is also playing up this morning so not a good start to the day. I think i am going to regret putting cream in my coffee!!

    Yesterday me and the little man spent some time in the garden. he loves being outdoors at the moment but you have to watch him like a hawk or he's pulling spiders legs off and trying to climb down steps when he isn't ready for it yet. Here's a couple of pics of my funny little guy from yesterday!

    I also forgot to mention that i have had my hair chopped off. Now i hate posting pictures of myself but i am going too. My hair was quite long, came below my bra strap but i was totally fed up with not being able to do anything with it so have gone for a shorter more managable style. What do you think?

    posted by Cath @ 9:20 AM   6 comments
    Wednesday, August 10, 2005
    Well i got to stay in bed til 8am this morning which was great because i slept terribly last night. Was a combination of factors really, it was too hot, too noisy(the rain) and i had a headache. I think i nodded off around 2am. Whether Corey actually woke up before 8am and was just being quite i don't know as he's normally up at 7am.

    So recently i have been suffering from Scrappers block. I have too many CJ's on the go and now when i look at a 12x12 page i find myself lost in the space wondering how on earth i'm going to fill it! I have managed to do a few this past week though but i haven't been altogether happy with them. The Deep in Thought was was Corey having a Daydreaming moment. Would love to know what he was thinking! The Dreams on the Bus is where he went to bed with his Wheels on the Bus book and somehow managed to get it looped over his shoulder like a handbag lol The bit at bottom right that says All about me is a magnetic journal that opens out and explains all about the pictures. The last one 'Simply Corey' are pictures taken in may 04 shortly after he came home from hospital. It's amazing to see how much he's changed!

    posted by Cath @ 8:49 AM   3 comments
    Tuesday, August 09, 2005
    Thanks for this Tiffiny!

    You Are 20% Weird

    Not enough to scare other people...
    But sometimes you scare yourself.

    posted by Cath @ 11:49 PM   1 comments
    Haven't updated in a while have i. It will all become clear why in a moment!

    Last tues we went to see Corey's consultant. All in all he is very pleased with Corey's progress. Actually in the letter we had from him it said delighted!
    So he asked about feeding again. Very much a bone of contention seen as Corey has had a feeding tube for 21 months now :(
    Anyway, he has done alot better recently. he'll drink a small amount of milk, eat a small amount of savoury and scoff yoghrts and desserts whenever we give them him, bad for teeth but good for calories!
    Anyway, after going though this with his doctor he said he thought it was time for the tube to come out and to give it a go without. Basically he'll either sink or swim. Well 8 days later and we are still afloat. I don't think we're swimming but we definately aren't sinking. I'm not going to say yet as i don't want to tempt fate. Today he has been bad at drinking his milk. Ideally to stay hydrated we want him to have at least 300mls. Today he only managed 250. He normally has 300-400mls. but he has had 150mls juice so although good on a fluid note, not so good on a calorie note. He has eaten OK though, well ok for Corey anyway!


    Today he has loved being outside. he loves to be in the garden, running around on the lawn, picking up twigs and bits of grass, playing in his empty paddling pool and generally getting grubby. It's a sad face he pulls when it's time to go inside.
    posted by Cath @ 11:38 PM   1 comments
    About Me

    Name: Cath
    Home: Sheffield, United Kingdom
    About Me: A baby will make love stronger, days shorter, nights longer, bankroll smaller, home happier, clothes shabbier, the past forgotten, and the future worth living for.
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